Masturbation has really funny and sometimes very creative names. Usually the act of masturbation is named to lights the act. It’s still a taboo subject, but not nearly as much as previous generations. Women have the G Rock. Once it was thought that it grows hair on the hands of your pals. Of course no one has ever experienced this and it was mainly a scare tactic because younger boys were masturbating too much and couldn’t get anything done at school. Nowadays there are funny names given to masturbating and here are some of the names for some good masturbation humor:
| Making pudding | Whipping up some baby batter | Cleaning the snorkel |
| Polishing the beak | Calling down for more mayo | Extracting a core sample |
| Salting your nuts in the shell | Putting miles on your monkey | Five against one |
| Five digit disco | Pickle dancing | Squeezing the burrito |
| Crowning the King | Worshiping the fist prince | Milking the weasel |
| Pounding the pepperoni | One-armed skiing | Cranking the love pump |
| Freeing Willy | Flogging the dolphin | Pumping the gas |
| Jerkin’ the gherkin | Sex with someone you really love | Slapping the happy sacks |
| Taunting the one-eyed weasel | Twisting your tool | Wrestling with Jimmy |
| Yanking the doodle | Hitchhiking to heaven | Doodling your noodle |
| Caping the crusader | Clubbing the baby seal | Going for the gold |
| Getting a grip on things | Devil’s Handshake | Climbin’ the tree |
| Clobbering the Kleenex | Beating Bob and the twins | Bashing the Bishop |
| Assault on a friendly weapon | Getting to know yourself | Greasing the flagpole |
